Fine free sex now no signing up

You’re not alone: Women today have less time for sex than their 1950s counterparts.

And it’s estimated that 40 million Americans have what experts call a sexless marriage (having sex less than 10 times a year). It can satisfy all sorts of emotional- and physical-intimacy needs and help partners stay close, says Anita H.

Clayton, MD, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Virginia and author of Satisfaction: Women, Sex, and the Quest for Intimacy. You can chalk it up to a sheer lack of time, but there are a slew of other reasons, too—from weight gain and perimenopause to technology overload (stop texting now) in the bedroom. We hear it over and over again: The bed should be used for sex and sleep only.

So why do so many of us insist on bringing third parties—laptops, PDAs, Law & Order—into the boudoir?

Add a few drops of ylang-ylang essential oil; the aroma is thought to heighten sexual feelings.

Many women find themselves withdrawing or not willing to experiment sexually if they’re overweight or have a change in shape due to pregnancy, Clayton says.

You may actually be raring to go, but your partner’s engine seems stalled.

Perhaps he’s emotionally withdrawing, says Bob Berkowitz, Ph D, co-author of He’s Just Not Up for It Anymore: Why Men Stop Having Sex, and What You Can Do About It.

Lubricants can also help, especially if pain during intercourse is a problem.

But don’t confront him with ‘What the hell is going on? When you’re feeling down in the dumps, desire can take a big hit, particularly if you’re female.

Women tend to isolate themselves, Clayton says, and that can strain even the strongest of romantic relationships.

Prior to menopause, hormonal shifts—specifically decreasing estrogen—lead to physiological changes that can make sex seem about as appealing as running a marathon with a pebble in your sock.

Sensitive vaginal tissues become less lubricated, the ensuing dryness leads to pain, and painful sex quickly turns into no sex. Sex Rx: Talk to your physician about the pros and cons of hormone replacement therapy (HRT), which may lessen menopausal symptoms.

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“The usual problems between husbands and wives can play out in the bedroom,” he says, especially if your partner has a hard time expressing his feelings properly.

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